Carl Reader

• Nov-2025
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On a campaign against Persia in the late third century A.D. the Praetorian Guard prefect, Mucapor, is summoned by Roman Emperor Aurelian to his tent. He is informed of the emperor's concerns about his private secretary and operative, Mnestheus, who h...

• May-2025
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A nature photographer, Theo Betz, encounters the parents of a missing young woman at the park one morning as he's going out to take pictures. Distraught but hopeful, the parents are giving out posters of their missing daughter to anyone who will take...

• Mar-2021
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Pieter Pullin Holdemtite is so large and so great a messiah in Pineville's Holy Church of Knee-Sniffers that he has to be born of two mothers. He comes out in two pieces, a top and a bottom, and has to be glued together. His mothers are consumed at b...

• Aug-2020
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Only once in a millennium does a fake news outlet come along that is so fake and disreputable that it matches the president it covers. Such an outlet is the WTF Network News, where lies, fantasy and chicanery dominate the coverage of the current dang...

• Mar-2019
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With the Devil on his deathbed, he decides to indulge in a final literary effort to clear his name and put the blame for all the madness and cruelty in the world where it belongs, on humans. He offers up this little book of evil stories that detail t...

• Sep-2018
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• Aug-2017
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Auntie Claus, Santa Claus' aunt, is an evil, magical elf who has always failed to ruin Christmas in the past, but now has the help of Malicious, who as the opposite of an elf is a self, and the Madison Avenue public relations firm of Steelman...

• Jun-2017
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These tales, written by an elf, tell of Santa's exploits at the North Pole and at various places across the globe. Set on Christmas Eve and Christmas, the stories detail Santa's love of his work, his wife Clara, the elves and elf-childre...

• Jun-2017
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A successful Hollywood producer returns home to New Jersey after a couple of divorces and the subsequent burn-out that attends a high-voltage career. Her overly controlling parents think she back to piece her life back together under their tutelage, ...

• Mar-2016
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• Aug-2015
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Joshua Skettleton, a narcoleptic Confederate soldier, is bat-shit crazy. The hope that he'll see his son Josh again and the friendship of another soldier, Jeb Charles, help him to cling to some semblance of humanity while the rank butchery, race, rel...

• May-2015
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Gwendolyn Gladys Gavin, the sometimes hideous, sometimes gorgeous and always quirky Blue Mountain witch, has a young son she doesn't much like, and she lets him know it in no uncertain terms, such as informing him she might still abort him, even thou...

• Oct-2014
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Allie Slayton might be a feminist detective, but the situation he faces in Mamba In A Basket forces him to make use of all the dark skills he learned as a Vietnam veteran and former college football player. An ancient African woman brings a body part...

• Oct-2014
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• Sep-2014
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After the final, monumental battle with the vampires and the resurrections of her husband and brother, Maggie awakens one morning with her back propped up against a tree on the side of the mountain with Mabin and Tommy nowhere to be found. She search...

• Aug-2014
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Nothing but odd news comes out of Pineville, as these short, satirical pieces of fake journalism prove. If you visit these pages, you'll read of a place where birds abduct obese children and put them on enforced diets, where the President of the Unit...

• Apr-2014
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Resurrection In Vampire Valley is the long-awaited second volume in the popular Vampire Valley series. It begins where The Hostage of Vampire Valley left off, with Maggie's lover Mabin still dead but about to be exhumed by her little brother Tommy af...

• Nov-2013
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During the Iraq War, a squad of soldiers comes upon some collateral damage , a little girl dressed in a white burqa at the bottom of a blast crater. When they discover she speaks English and Arabic, they decide to take her with them on a rogue combat...

• Sep-2013
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The story of William Penn is one of great personal tragedy as well as great ability and courage in the face of religious persecution. In England in the seventeenth century, Penn was jailed six times for his beliefs as a Quaker, yet through his connec...

• Feb-2013
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So brilliant and quirky is the future's leading genius, Mithrose, that he believes he's become an all-powerful God. As a personality trait, that belief is bad enough, but then he reports to the Impersator, the galaxy's current tyrant and mass murdere...

• Nov-2012
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• May-2012
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Bloody Potomac 2, My Mother Bites is the second in the Bloody Potomac series, in which just about everybody in Washington is a vampire, werewolf or zombie - including the President. The main character, Tasha O'Burke, who is the President's daughter, ...

• Apr-2012
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Now We Know Why You Died, a play, is a dark psychological crime thriller in three acts set in New York City before the Twin Towers fell, when everybody seemed to be their own worst enemies. Allie Slayton, a disturbed and burnt-out private detective a...

• Mar-2012
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Tasha O'Burke, the President's vampire daughter, gives birth to a baby boy who shows great promise to grow into a powerful member of the clan. From the moment he's born, he shows a lusty desire for blood, but the Washington Ghouls see him as a bargai...

• Dec-2011
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Tasha O'Burke, the daughter of the President of the United States and willing vampire, is happily stalking young congressmen on her birthday with her girlfriend, Cari Anne Pomegranate, when there's a bloody rebellion against her father. Led by Speake...

• Jun-2011
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In this book are short stories about various people behaving and perceiving as they shouldn't ... a young man drives women out of existence when he disrobes them ... a toddler wants to stab her mother after what's she's seen in the bedroom and on TV ...

• May-2011
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Gatsby Girls, a sequel to the classic novel The Great Gatsby, continues the saga of a Jazz Age dream gone wrong, that of Jay Gatsby for Daisy Buchanan. The dreamer is dead, but Daisy is unrepentant and plans an abortion before leaving her drunken, ab...

• May-2011
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Forced to move to Montana with her parents' murderers, half-mad Maggie climbs the walls of her home at night, only to discover blood-spitting vampires trapped in vats on her roof. A lover helps her discover her powers, and the two brave severe attack...

• Mar-2011
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Based on the Odyssey, D'eannuosity, A Woman Warrior's Odyssey in Iraq, is the story of D'eannu Christensen, a spy dropped into Iraq two years before that conflict began. The novel starts ten years later when her daughter, T'Deannu, begins a search fo...

• Mar-2011
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As the title suggests, this offering contains three stories of the strange and grotesque. In "His Angels He Charges With Error" a priest is determined to discover why his brother, also a priest, committed suicide. He's forced to confront a bl...

• Jan-2011
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After a ghost is refused entrance to heaven he's kicked down to earth by a gigantic blue angel with the flu. He's been dead for ten years and has nowhere to go but home. Once there he discovers he can re-materialize if he wishes hard enough. Seeing h...

• Dec-2010
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For years many wished to see a former president in Hell. With Dubya and the Devil, they have the chance. Dubya crashes into Hell with his own agenda. So powerful is he that he literally pulls Lucifer up to Heaven by the horns. There, Dubya leads t...

• Dec-2010
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By the time Osama bin Laden arrives in Oklahoma City late in this satirical novel, Omar And The Bomb, it's pretty clear his protege Omar Urdu has botched his assignment to pull off another terror attack in the country's heartland. You see, hapless Om...

• Dec-2010
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• Nov-2010
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In A Circle of Stars is an epic adventure revolving around the aftermath of one of the most famous battles in American History, The Battle of the Little Bighorn, only this time it's told as fiction from the point of view of the Native Americans who w...

• Oct-2010
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In Elias, The Twelfth Elf of Kindness, a tiny elf smaller than a dime befriends a little boy, Penman Duckworth, by climbing in his ear to hide from the world. Despite Penman's pleas for the tiny visitor to leave, Elias stays and slowly reveals his ma...

• Sep-2010
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When a boy from Ireland finds a little man dragging a chest of gold across a forest floor, he mistakes him for a leprechaun. He is granted wishes, but all the wishes go terribly wrong, so wrong that the two of them end up on the moon chased by a croc...

• Apr-2010
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When his son is caught in the Delaware River, Sam, a shad, deals with Al, a human, to allow himself to be caught every year for the town's annual prize for the biggest fish. In other tales, Sam recounts his adventures in the seven seas - Al learns of...

• Mar-2010
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The Stolen Child is a novella of one very special day in the life of a boy in the 1950s, a day that defines his existence from then on. The day begins with a kiss from a girl and ends with a devastating insight into his mother's life, a life that has...

• Dec-2009
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Babbit Rabbit, Jr. lives alone with his mother and has to learn to be a big rabbit all by himself. In these stories, he mistakes a snake for a carrot, helps build a garden of delicious vegetables, falls in love, eats too much carrot pie and learns va...

• Dec-2009
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• Dec-2009
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Helen has a face and figure that could launch a thousand ships, but a sexual disposition that could sink them all. An illness reveals to her the bland life she's been leading, and she transforms into a new raucous sexual being, a horny comedian inten...

• Nov-2009
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Forced to move to Montana with her parents' murderers, half-mad Maggie climbs the walls of her home at night, only to discover blood-spitting vampires trapped in vats on her roof. A lover helps her discover her powers, and the two brave severe attack...

• Nov-2009
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A spring morning in Montana is shattered when Joseph Smith emerges from his tepee and his young wife is shot dead at his feet. He races after his wife's murderer but kills Three Pigs before he finds why the man murdered his bride. He returns to Banna...

After longing for years to be considered a human being, Bigfoot finds a clever way to establish himself as a man. He hold a mass rally with supporters and the hated fake news media to detail just how he left his forest days behind and became a very i...

Evan Palmer of One America Network News (ONAN) follows Bigfoot to Chile for a story about how some dastardly creatures in that South American country conspired to commit election fraud and steal the American presidential election. He finds Bigfoot fr...

To his surprise, Bigfoot falls in love with the incomparable Bertha Bay-Ellen Smerconish while traveling through the magnificent wonders of Yellowstone National Park. He is smitten at once, and they plan on getting married that night in the Yellowsto...

Bigfoot Gets Vaccinated is about as descriptive as a title can get, but it does not begin to depict the pitiful sobbing melodrama, overdone emotional upheaval and absurdly anxious over-intellectualization of our greatest forest creature as he is drag...

A rapturous crowd of followers greets Bigfoot as he opens a new shoe store for big-footed people only. As he points out the evils of small-footed people, Bigfoot further garners support and love from the big-footed crowd. He has several special surpr...

Bigfoot awakes one morning to discover he's burned out by living in one of the most beautiful environments in the world. He walks a hundred miles to his travel agent and sets up a world tour of three of the most horrendous places on earth. This short...

After participating in the January 6 insurrection, a reluctant Bigfoot comes before congress to testify about his role in breaking into congress and participating in the violence. He presents his evidence of discarded ballots in a most peculiar way a...