I Said the Spyder — Larry Johns

Jackie Ryderbeit is a member of a "Shadow Ops" team of MI6. His live-in partner works for a research section of MI5, and she is unaware of what her man actually does for a crust. So Ryderbeit is living a lie within a lie. Worse, when things go disastrously wrong, the woman he loves finds herself unable to claim even the dubious protection of the non-combatant.
To get at the truth - in a world that deals in lies - Ryderbeit has to methodically chip away at the normality of indifference and betrayal that skulk behind the façade. It seems that the system is there to pervert, and everyone who is anyone - including himself - is guilty as charged. And the guilt has no upper limit. In fact, the higher up the chain of command you delve, the deeper lies the guilt. In the end, the trick will be to find a friend who can help when your back is hard against the wall. But what if all your friends have died in the line of that same duty...what then?