Real Cool Vampire — Gary Newsom

Fifteen year old Max Ferratu is convinced that he is a "real vampire". His dream is to kill the head cheerleader, except it won't really be killing because, through a convoluted, ancient process (that Max just happened to make up) that Max is SURE will work, he will turn Jessica Romero into a zombie, and this will surely make her fall in love with him, thus producing the most compelling vampire-zombie love story ever told! Will true love prevail? For Jessica's...and everyone's else's...sake, let's sincerely hope not.